Saturday, December 11, 2010
Oh man. It's been awhile since I've felt willing and SUCCESSFUL at holding a fucking conversation in this language. I think I was seriously just really burnt out from that test and studying things I didn't really want to study for the last 4 months. Before tonight, I'd dread having interactions with the Japanese people I knew, because I felt like I'd stepped into this stupid hole. I couldn't understand anything, and I could hardly get anything intelligible out of my mouth. Today in general, I felt pretty decently confident and really enjoyed talking to everyone I DID interact with. I think I'm finally warming up to my friends and JTE's more... I'm not as nervous around them (coughmoutainsenseicough) and don't mind making mistakes because... DUH. I'm gonna make mistakes and I'm gonna say stupid shit so might as well try to communicate and have fun instead of being shy, learning nothing, and having a disappointing time.
Going out with Nat-chan, Ryoku-chan, Sea and Bee was really nice and I wanted to do that SOOOO much more than Taiko. Me and Nat-chan have kept on trying to make plans to hang out so I'm really glad we were able to. I seriously love that girl. She's really nice and funny and odd, and every time we hang out I feel more and more comfortable and able to make up some sort of thing to talk about. I know it'll be awhile before we can talk like me and other JETs do... but that's only because there is a language barrier I think. I'll slowly get better at Japanese, and they'll keep opening up to me until we can maybe finally talk on the same level. :) I'll keep 頑張る-ing until I can be competent.... maybe getting a かれし would help with that, but I don't see that as something that seems to be coming into my life any time soon...